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That toxic behavior cost me friendships and close contact with relatives. In the end, I knew my life was not going to go anywhere with this woman in my life so I left. Moving to a different state helped a lot because my mom has anxiety to leave within a mile radius of home. She resorted to name calling, insults, attacking my partners, finding where I worked and calling me there Never gave her that number.

She would send me angry messages about how I am an awful son and she wished I was never born. She sent pictures of my things I had left behind in her home and said she sold them.

She showed me pictures of gifts I had given her over the years smashed to bits. She was stalking my social media and I had to change all of it, lock things down, change numbers, etc. Their safety speech before they break out the liquor. You need to take care of yourself first.

If your mother is that much of a lying scumbag piece of subhuman filth, then yes, it is very much okay to push that toxic bitch out of your life. Why let someone that should be nurturing do it? Mine is addicted to opioids. After years of taking care of her shit, I cut ties.

There is no reason for a kid at 19 to be taking care of his year-old mom. It was an incredibly difficult, scary, and taboo thing to do. There will be nights that you wonder if it might be better, having had time away. Blood is thicker than water, OP. OP, my dear, dear kindred soul, you had no say in your birth or childhood. Make it a good one. I am so with you, my dear kindred soul. But I am rooting you on at every challenge you meet. You have so absolutely got this. She was extremely verbally abusive toward me growing up.

Once she started threatening my life and harassing me at work, my boss an ex-cop himself called the police and I cut contact with her. She had has mental health issues that she has either ignored, self-medicated for, etc. When I was young 9 or so I was taken by CPS for no food in the fridge, her boyfriend pretty seriously abusing myself and my siblings, and general uninhabitable living conditions. She lost custody to my father who was military but thankfully stationed in the same town at the time and we were immediately placed in his custody.

However, the courts in California are, and in some ways still are, very slanted toward the mother. So she gets weekend visitation unsupervised with us and more shady stuff happens. She stops showing up for visits more and more until she stops completely. Fast forward to me working through some of what happened when I was a kid and I send her a very emotional e-mail.

I felt like I put my entire heart in that message and at the end was asking for a simple apology and a desire to move forward with a healthy relationship. Her response was that obviously I still had some issues and I should just move on like she did. That tore it, I was done. Sometimes people are like that due to fixable issues be it relapsing into addiction, or being intolerant of the choice of an SO, etc.

Sometimes cutting off a family member whose toxicity and negative impact actually helps them get over their shit. But what it does mean is their bullshit is not your bullshit anymore.

But family is more than blood relationship. We make our own families. Sometimes its blood ties. Sometimes its ties of friendship and respect. It used to make me feel guilt, but you know what? No, blood does not give people a free pass to fuck your life up and continue to fuck your life up. She went completely off the deep end at my wedding, booing my wife and I. She destroyed her bouquet and said we gave her a lesser one. When we were announced at the reception, she booed. Bar none, she acted like the lowest of the low, something slightly above that first amphibian crawling out of the primordial ooze and calling itself a land dweller.

If there was anything she could do that was destructive, she did it. Try your best not to hesitate and even if your family judges you for it, you are no less of a human being. My mom was a drug addict and alcoholic that had her first child at 16; I came 13 years later, and she still chose the party life over her children. For years, she promised to be at functions, pick me up for a weekend or even come visit and would constantly no show because she was at a bar.

High school graduation, drunk, college graduation, drunk, wedding, drunk. I have since pushed her out of my life and could not be happier. One word of advice: Some people have a strong social need. Think about how they have treated you in the past and how they may treat you in the future and act the same way you would if it was someone outside of your family.

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25 People Explain Why They No Longer Speak To Their Mother | Thought Catalog

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