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Just want fun no bs

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Each time I see you I wish we could just sit and talk, but I'm kinda on the shy side, also I'm a student, and I don't know if you're single.

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But I guess depending on the type of relationship it was, this can be devastatingly difficult to do But one must try, if one is convinced the relationship is well and truly dead. But if not, work hard to get it right, to avoid having regrets later I am not suggesting for a moment that it is an easy thing to do.

As I say, I think it is harder for women than men, so I won't even pretend to know what it is like from experience. I guess I agree that if it isn't dead, work hard to get it right.

BUT, a lot of women use wishful thinking to hide the fairly plain fact that it IS dead. More than anything else, this post is an admonition to be honest with yourself when you are trying to decide whether or not it is dead. Trying to "just be friends" is in most cases a symptom of self-deception. What do you recommend in the event you are expecting the man's child? Absolutely stupid and unplanned but, reality none the less. The relationship may not work, but for the unborn child's sake He's not a bad guy, you just realize your lives have taken different turns.

I just broke up with the guy I was seeing for 4 months. I am in my late 40's and so is he. He is defintely on the fence. He has a very demanding job so we didn't see each other as much as I wanted anyway but I fell for him hard. However, one thing he did do was say that he didn't think it wouold be a good idea for us to stay sexual because of hurt feelings when he asked me to be friends.

I finally told him I could not be his friend. It's just not going to happen. He was really upset with me about this and then went on to tell me that like every other woman, when she doesn't get what she wants, cuts him off!! We don't need the headache. Men chap my ass when they are not serious and players. I learn more and more reading websites.

I am friends with a few exes, but it's not something that happened right away. You do need time and distance away from the person to move on.

It's also never going to be a deep friendship like you'd have with someone who has only ever been platonic. It's more just that we mostly enjoyed each other's company while and keep in touch occasionally out of fondness.

I think there needs to be a differentiation between being friends and being friendly when it comes to exes. One indicates maturity and the other desperation. There's a difference between seeking out an exes company and being nice in the company of an ex. What about a serious boyfriend who: Is it just friendly?

Could it ever be platonic after sexual and emotional intimacy? Or perhaps your comments are more directed to a fresh breakup where you "Promise to be Stay Friends"? No, I think my comments still apply, but it also sounds like the breakup with him was more a matter of circumstance than disinterest - unless you are leaving something out.

Maybe this guy wants to get back together with you. If this is the case, it is worth seeing where it goes, but don't fool yourself or let him fool you into thinking you are hanging out with him as "just friends. And if you are honest with yourself, I think you will admit that you either want to date him, or nothing else.

He said he was breaking up with me because of the long distance and uncertainty of where he would end up career wise at the end of school. He said his feelings weren't strong enough to hang on and maintain in the interim. He didn't believe we would end up in the same place which interestingly we have a due to him proactively choosing to relocate here. So that's the whole story.

Does it change your comments? If his feelings weren't strong enough to hang on and maintain the relationship, chances are they won't be strong enough now to re-initiate it. But, you never know. I would be very cautious about how you approach your interactions with him.

After a few times hanging out, I sugggest you find out though it might be obvious without asking what his intentions are, and if he isn't interested in dating you again, drop him.

So you are saying men and women can be friends after emotional and sexual intimacy, but it has to be after some cooling off period. Of a few months or years. So if an ex contacts you three years later, it could be platonic, even if neither are involved with anyone else? No, I'm not saying that; I am saying that he either wants to date you again, or just wants sex or some kind of ego-boost, or possibly just to enjoy your company the way he did when you were dating.

Whatever he wants, you can be sure it isn't platonic. I am saying that if his motivation isn't a desire to get back together, cut him off because he is wasting your time and emotional energy. I was in a similar situation. I was dating my college acquaintance turned coworker and it was great until I said that I was applying to full-time grad school in another city at least 1. This won't be until years, but he wanted to set the foundation for a long-term relationship and he was upfront that distance was a non-negotiable.

I have since cut-off contact and am working on forgiveness as we were good friends and are still co-workers , but a part of me is angry that he broke up over future distance -- I won't be in grad school for years.

Is he immature for giving up so soon? I know that there are men out there who will stay with me despite the transition, but I know in my heart that this situation would not be the best foundation for a solid relationship that may lead to marriage. Should I just focus on grad school and wait until I am in a more permanent place before I start looking for a serious relationship? What about proposing friendship with someone you've only been on 1 or 2 dates with?

I have met a few guys online that I didn't have chemistry with, but who I thought were interesting and cool. You thought they were interesting and cool, but they want to date you or have sex with you, not be "pals. Be honest with yourself - do these guys want to be "just friends" with you?

I see your point. It's just really hard to make opposite-sex friends. In total agreement Andrew. I'm not sure why women love to go around collecting 'friends' another delusion is women who have gay friends they claim as their gay 'husband'. Clean break is best all round. Anonymous July 24 do you really want to be available for a guy who dumped you 3 years ago? I didn't say I was available to him, although I am single. I'm just trying to analyze his motivation for staying in touch in light of Andrew's posting about inability to remain friends with ex's.

He sure as heck is not going to be my friend, I wont allow it. He ripped my heart out three years ago and I'm not going down a friendship path. I don't know how I will respond to what he says if he wants to date. If it comes up when he gets to town. Andrew says whatever he wants, its not pure and platonic or friendly.

So we shall see. I've always agreed with Andrew's basic premise. If you are intimate emotionally and sexually, you can't go back to being friends. Not in the short term and not in the long term either. And for that matter, I don't think opposite sex friendships between people who never dated are platonic.

Oh my God, I have so many ex's to delete out of my contacts Wish I had seen this post sooner and really taken it to heart. So what is the thinking behind this situation?

I broke up with my boyfriend of barely 2 months , and he asked to remain friends. I told him no, because we had started out as potential lovers we were never friends before we had met and since we had no background as friends, it would just be a pretense to call each other that. I was pretty adamant on this point, but after a few weeks I relented, and we were "friends" from then on out. We have both moved on to other people, but he still gets angry whenever I mention that we are with other people, and that he should be respecting whatever new girl he is with he hooks up a lot.

And after every such fight which are usually via text he immediately apologizes, not wanting to end on bad terms-- so why, if he knows there's no chance of getting back together, or of hooking up, and though we never really hang out, why does he insist on being "friends" if he does just fine with girls?

Is this some kind of "I'm a good guy" complex? He still wants you. You are the "guy" who dumped him. Just flip all of the references to male and female in the post and it will make sense. You reluctantly agreed to remain friends, and he is trying to perpetuate the relationship in an effort to get you back. Eventually he will realize it isn't happening and give up, but it probably won't happen overnight. Anonymous, thank you so much for your post! We dated about 2 months and then broke up because we both moved from the country where we had lived together to another countries we moved because work and studies.

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Bad boys and girls are highly overrated, Tina Fey recently said in an interview with Vanity Fair. She's got a point: Why choose drama over kindness? When the exhilarating novelty of dating someone dangerous fades, we really would rather spend time with someone who will be nice to us. Aziz Ansari took a hard look at millennials' dating rituals for his book Modern Romance , and he found that too many people are clinging to "ideal girlfriend" checklists, he told the New York Post.

But the truth is, all you need is someone you can hang with doing absolutely nothing — that's the simple criteria that matters. When Jennifer Aniston told Glamour what she needed in a relationship, she listed qualities that speak to a person's character.

But a relationship filled with drama-fueled excitement is hardly a better alternative in the long run. That's all we really need. Related stories by this author. Why women's rights activists want a "no" vote for Brett Kavanaugh. Most recent This Week in Politics: Trump goes on last-minute rally blitz as midterm campaigns enter final days.

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Poor little Mia. The New York City Jewess is a big time radical feminist man hater, Trotsky Marxist and lezbo. Loves Hillary and hates Trump. Her low brow Jew noggin was twisted to hell by Trump’s election in I've lost count of the times girls have tried being "just friends" with me after I've called off the relationship. It's happened after one-night stands, it's happened after dating girls for a few weeks, it even happened after having a serious I know this isn't only something I've experienced. Who is BS&F? We created a boot camp challenge for anyone who is ready to stop making excuses and get the results they want! It is a four-week indoor/outdoor program of boot camp instruction, nutritional counseling and motivational training.